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[00:00:00] The battle for the mind of North America will be fought in the video arena. The television screen is the retina of the mind's eye. Therefore, the television screen is part of the physical structure of the brain.
[00:00:29] Oh, and welcome back to episode... What did we say, 96? 96! Of The Outer Reels. I'm Jason, and that was Sam. Hello! Hello! This week, I subjected Sam to what is a remake, ripoff of World Gone Wild. I'm not sure which, but it's the same story in Dune Warriors. That is the first... Just say it, Sam.
[00:00:57] That's the first thing I had written on my notes. Welcome to World Gone Wild 2, Dune Warriors. It's not... I can't even call it a sequel. It's the same story. It's such a blatant ripoff. It's amazing. It's weird. Yeah. I mean, it's... I get it because they're both... they're both riffs on Seven Samurai, but they both use water as like the main focal point. It's just quite funny. Yeah, and the water is not featured very much in this.
[00:01:24] At least with World Gone Wild, there was like the spring and all the stuff. In this movie, they kind of just talk about the water and people drink out of cups, but you don't see it like as a asset or... No, I think not as an asset. Although they do get to see two of the women characters bathe in it at one point, which I think is just an excuse to see them topless. Grotto scene, of course. Yeah. If they're in a cave and they're just swimming and there's a waterfall, you're washing yourselves in your drinking water.
[00:01:54] Yeah. Maybe you might have a separate source. That's probably a good idea. Yeah. Well, out of all the poor decisions that are made in this film, that's really not one of the worst. That's true. Very true. So, welcome back, Ciro Santiago. It's another one of his. Once again. Yep. Welcome back to the same sort of sand dunes that we've had in about four other movies so far. This is his third appearance on our show. Is it the third? There you go.
[00:02:23] We can't remember if it was the third or the fourth. Certainly not the last, but we had Wheels of Fire and then Equalizer 2000. Right. And now this movie. I also have another one of his in the tank coming very soon. Of course you do. I think I've got three or four more to be honest. Yeah. I mean, what else can we say about Ciro Santiago? He is the long arm of the Roger Corman world of the East. He's done a bunch of stuff. We talked about him over 200 film credits of legendary proportion.
[00:02:53] If you do want to learn more about him, go back and listen to our wheels of fire episode because we do a bit of a deep dive on him. But you already heard that. So there's no need. But yeah, that's right. This is Dune Warriors from 1991. Again, just it really does feel like a worse version of world gone wild. And I didn't like world gone wild. Exactly. But this makes world gone wild look great. Yeah, there was. I mean, like all of these, I wanted to like it. As soon as Carradine's on screen, I'm like, sure, this is fine.
[00:03:22] I enjoy him being there. They don't do anything with him. He's underutilized. Well, I think he's phoning it in too. He does some sort of pseudo martial art moves that are up there with like Steven Seagal's Russian judo example, you know, expeditions or whatever, where he's just kind of throwing people who are already going in that direction. I believe the correct term for that is bullshido. Bullshido. There you go. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah.
[00:03:47] You know, and these guys are running around with wooden swords that are spray painted silver and kind of look like her gold bars from a few movies back. Yeah. From Endgame. No, the thing is Carradine has, and I brought this up on Endgame where he has that. He's just seems bothered to be there. Like, it feels like he was doing in the middle of doing something he was enjoying. Well, I think I was saying, like, he's just out working in his tool shed, working on something. And then they're like, come on down.
[00:04:17] He's like, okay. And he's just kind of, he just shows up all the time. And he's the progression of him doesn't feel like there's anything. He feels like the first time you see him on screen and the last time you see him on screen, he's just like, okay, I got to get the shot in the can so I can move on. I think it's just, he's capable. It's just poorly utilized and, you know, there's no real direction he's given here. Probably was on set for three day shoot, you know, to be real. So, yeah.
[00:04:45] Although, you know, hopefully it was more than, you know, at least one day where he just wasn't wearing pants. Just such a weird costume. The first time we see him, no pants. That is exactly part of my, I mean, so tell me, how do you pitch this movie? What is it? It's post-apocalyptic seven samurai or be like, hey, did you see work on wild? Let's do that in the Philippines. Pretty much.
[00:05:11] I had, this is probably in the final hours of like late stage Mad Max rip offs too. Cause we're getting into the nineties now and these movies are dying off hard. And I had David Carradine dresses like a Harry Krishna does a good deed by helping people who live in a quarry, continue to live in a quarry where he gets into one sword fight and chooses not to wear pants. He's got such weird outfit.
[00:05:38] Like the Harry Krishna outfit is very reminiscent of his Kung Fu outfit, which I think is probably intentional. But then he's got like this black one with these sort of cheap plastic medallions and things that doesn't have pants. Like it's just this long kind of it's tunic and it's like, it looks like he's wearing like a woman's swimsuit and then like big shoulders. Like it's a weird, it's a weird costume.
[00:06:05] And well, and then, then when we see Miranda for the first time, she's sort of the Filipino sort of bad-ass warrior we run into. I thought for a minute, she wasn't wearing pants either. Then I realized she's just wearing like skin colored tights. Yeah. Bad choice for leggings on this. Yes. It took me a while to realize like she just not like she just barely covering, but no, no, she was wearing tights. But you couldn't really tell that till you saw them later after they got a bit dirty. Right. Yeah. They finally some scuff.
[00:06:34] You're like, oh, okay. Yeah. So the official summary for this movie on IMDB is after the end of the world, Earth is a thirsty planet ruled by vicious warlords. One woman is brave enough to fight back. She bands together five warriors to save her town and their precious water. Again, five versus seven samurai. It's five on this one, same as it was in World Gone Wild. So bizarre. I was amazed by this.
[00:07:03] And I got the feeling of that within the first 20 minutes. I was like, oh, now we're just assembling a team and they're going to help out. Why? How did anybody think this was a good idea when World Gone Wild exists and it's not a good movie? Thinking that this is the better version. Well, like you have to wonder, did they see this? Are they aware of it? And then they just blatantly ripped it off? Or did they just come up with this on their own? Because water in the apocalypse is going to be a commodity.
[00:07:32] So it's always discussed. Yeah. And there's a billion movies that do a riff on seven samurai. But it is, it's funny because this is only four years later. Like this had to have been written within a couple of years of World Gone Wild coming out. Yeah. Like it's, it's crazy. Um, it'd be interesting to find out how long the script's been kicking around and maybe, but different writers and someone ripped someone off.
[00:07:56] I think the only reason I'm glad I watched for Gone Wild now is because to compare it to this movie. Yeah. Like, because it's so strange to me. That's the redeeming quality of that movie is that these things are so, so similar. This is another movie where you gotta ask yourself like, does Carradine like elevate this movie or stabilize it or anything? Like is the reason that I was able to hang. I'd argue he adds nothing to it. No, that's it.
[00:08:22] Like for the first time watch, I'm like, okay, something cool is going to happen because he's on screen and it doesn't. And I don't, I think you could put anybody else in there and I wouldn't be like, oh, awesome. Or like, man, this really needs Carradine. At least in crime zone, he felt like an important character and had some interesting thing. And that whole government black ops stuff and everything else that he was tied to was interesting. This could be anybody.
[00:08:52] It doesn't matter who his characters in this. Totally. And I think in crime zone, he was a little more invested because they let me, I guess they gave him like a producer credit on that. Yeah. Maybe. So whereas, whereas this, he's just a hired gun and I don't think he cares. Well, this being later in Ciro Santiago's career too, they're banging these movies out. So this could have been just to get him for these three days, read these lines, shoot it, move on as well.
[00:09:17] Like it could be a reflection of Ciro's investment also, because just like we saw with Godfrey Ho, some of these movies they make, they don't even remember making these because they made so many. Yeah. I was surprised to not see any reused footage. I really tried to look cause I was like, some of these cars are going to be the same. And I think maybe there's a Lincoln in it that I see that I think maybe we've seen in a couple of other movies, but. Yeah. I think a couple of, yeah, for sure.
[00:09:44] That car looked really familiar to me too, but I don't think they were using any actual, we don't see them driving much. So no. Yeah. For as much as you would. There's no chases or anything in this. So. No, that's what's weird too. There's all these vehicles and they only kind of use them to arrive in a scene. There's no like actual road chases or like vehicular action in any which way, which is strange too. They do use them at one point to shoot rockets at the base in the final battle. Yeah.
[00:10:12] When they charge it, somehow those rockets fly up and over the wall and then land in the middle of the courtyard and stuff. The wall. It's like the walls. The wall is so flimsy. Like I built stronger forts when I was a kid. Like it's so, and I'm serious. These are painted two by fours. I mean, it's just. So yeah. And then all the huts, all the huts are built out of like styrofoam bricks.
[00:10:36] Again, it's got that real medieval times chic where the houses are supposed to be this big stone and it looks, it, it looks comical. It really doesn't. Yeah. It's. Yeah. And, and everything's so freshly painted for this to be the apocalypse. The only thing that stands out worse is like, it's like spray painted styrofoam. That's like jet black and jet gray in the middle of nowhere. So the production design is all over the place. Their costumes are all, they all look again.
[00:11:05] They're trying to look medieval. A lot of ways, a lot of cloaks and things, but again, everything looks new. Nothing looks used for what is supposed to be. I don't know. 40, 50 years after the apocalypse at least. Yeah. This, this has that same problem where. And when the end battle was happening, I was like, man, it's really hard to tell the civilians or the good guys versus the bad guys. Cause they don't even have much like cool football armor and stuff.
[00:11:32] Like every now and then there's a bad guy with a ski mask or every now and then there's a bad guy. He's got like a green coat, but for the most part, everybody kind of looks the same. There's not a real visual division between the two clans tribes or whatever the hell you want. And well, we have, we, that we have a, a, a boss in William, uh, like our villain, I should say in William that has zero motivation for anything. We don't know why he does, does what he does. Then the movie starts off with a bang.
[00:12:01] It starts off with William's guys just attacking this town. God talk about it. But it's like, there's, there's no opening credits. There's no prologue. There's no intro that I thought I skipped some of the movie cause I hit play and we watched this on to be by the way. And I hit play and I was like, Oh, have I been watching this previously? Cause it just started. And like, I was like, Oh, maybe this is a movie I'd already been watching. And I was like, no, this is actually beginning of the movie. There's yeah.
[00:12:28] It's a, I went back and I was like, no, I am at the beginning. And then yeah, boom, just they attack. And then, and then William is like, it's like, kill them all. Yeah. Yeah. William is a bit of a familiar face played by Luke ask you, and he's in everything. Um, a hundred credits, easy rider to a million TV shows, including auto man, airwolf, fall guy.
[00:12:55] He is that face where you're like, I know this guy, but you can't pin the single thing that he's from. Yeah, exactly. Like just one of those typical TV character actors that were in everything. He was in a night rider. He's in a fall guy. As you mentioned an auto man, uh, MacGyver, Simon and Simon, even a couple of murder. She wrote, and then he was in Kung Fu legend continues. So he hooked up with Garrity and a few years later. So yeah. Yeah.
[00:13:22] So Rick Hill also playing John, by the way, I think the, the names for these guys in these movies are probably the, like, they're not even like, at least they were like, they used to be like Slater and 10 degree. And 10 watt and all these sort of different names that this is Michael, John, William, Dorian. Okay. Dorian's the most interesting name. Jason. Yeah. Yeah. Rialto Lewis. Like there's just, it's a, yeah. We got a Miranda.
[00:13:48] We got a Thomas, you know, our Val is, is our heroine. Michael and John are two main good guys. William's the bad guy. Jason's another bad guy who has to fight. The first right did not be killed after he's captured. The sub bad guy. He's like the mini boss. Yeah. Like he's like second in command, but it was just like, no thought into these names. Oh, he couldn't have even been the William. I want to say striker. It's so cut and dry.
[00:14:16] It's, it's, it's almost like it takes effort to have this many plain names in a movie like this actually. But you should mention Rick Hill is in this. He plays John. Now he is in a lot of stuff. He's Mr. TV. Cheers. Dixie hazard the master. But also I wanted to talk to him because I wanted to talk about him because also he's in death stalker, but he is the death stalker for death. So, and he was also in some other stuff, but it's just funny that he's in the sequel of
[00:14:46] class of 1999, which as we know is already a sequel, but he was in class of 1992. He was in class of 1999 to the substitute and, oh, and one episode of Jack. Nice. Yeah. And, but again, carried in with top billing, there's just not much happening in this movie. It's brighter and more colorful than all the other movies we've seen for a while. Except the ones that's ripping off. Yeah. No, actually. Yeah.
[00:15:15] Not as, but it does have that, again, that steel frontier nineties feel to it. Everything's a little brighter. Yeah. Nothing's as dusty. There, there was a genuine feeling. I'll say it back again, wheels of fire, just cause it was also Santiago. There still has a little more genuine feel where people are dusty and things look a little more arid. This really just looks like people put these sets up the day before or the day off and filmed.
[00:15:41] I actually think the quarry where this all takes place is the same quarry from wheels of fire. Certain of it. There's a, they, they see them driving along and I swear they're just on the coast of the sand dunes we've seen in both other movies. Yeah. It's, uh, they're in the same stretch of road on the Philippines. They just keep using it over and over. I said, yeah, that was, that was what got me. And I was like, that's that same road that forks off. Yeah. You also kind of get away with it because the idea that like people can't watch all of
[00:16:10] these, you, you can't have, I mean, some people do. There are people that let's be clear, like us watching these right now. But the, the case is, is that most of the time these movies are made for, you're not expecting the same people to watch every single one back to back and be picking this stuff out. So. Well, and of course, and for us, this is an absolute loop. I did not intentionally pick this knowing it had any resemblance to world gone wild that we did two weeks ago. It's amazing.
[00:16:36] As, as my last pick movie, I I'm watching this going, Oh wow. Okay. I just grabbed it because it was on my list and it had David Garrity. And I just thought, Hey, let's do this. And it was called Dune Warriors. And I thought, I wonder if they're trying to do a rip on dune or anything like that. And it's like, no, it has, there's, there's not even any dunes in it. There's just like, you kind of see the little bit of sand dune when they're driving along, but that's not a factor at all in this story. Like it has no reason to be called that. Yeah.
[00:17:04] This movie being again, late, like I said, late stage Mad Max, it, it has a lot of elements of stuff we've seen. And the more of these we watch, the more familiar things we'll get, but this also had, had some real battle truck vibes to it too. And I know you could say basically any of these movies we watch are kind of similar, but just the whole thing with the town and how this one gang or come, you know, preying on them or planning to show up. There's a common thread here.
[00:17:32] That's almost accidental with these movies. Like they're not watching these movies saying it needs to be like battle trucker. It needs to be like, we're going wild. And it needs to, you, you only just have a finite amount of things you can choose from in a wasteland scenario. Cause you've got to be like low on gas, no food, no water. So you make all of the tragedies or all of the goals or assets of the movie have to revolve around that.
[00:17:57] So you're going to get so many similarities because you can only have so many, uh, so many dramatic moments around these same resource things before you start seeing the same thing. Well, and, and again, and then the entire story around this is again, just a, it's seven samurai. It's a town that's going to get attacked and they're bringing in people. They're high, bringing iron guns to help them out.
[00:18:24] And that's a story that's being told over and over and over again as well. I mean, the magnificent seven probably does the best version of it, but it's, we see it over and over again. So yeah. Yeah. And this, I think around 20 minutes in what I thought was actually a reasonable timing for the first act. I was like, Oh, it's this movie again. And I didn't realize it was going to be that at first, but it opens straight away with like said, exploding people being shot.
[00:18:53] There's just a village being blown up. There's rockets. It again, in these times where water and everything is scarce, they're pretty happy to just be spending like all of their rockets and everything on this like shithole little town too. They fire so many rockets in this. I was like, yeah. And so these guys are blowing up this stuff. Here's another thing about this movie. I don't know the name of the bad guys. I don't know the name of the good guys. It's just William and his crew. There's not even like a name for the gang.
[00:19:23] Like they don't even know there's, there's like a name of the town that they're attacking. And that it's like Chintley or something like that. And that's it. That's all you get. It's the name of the town. But the, you know, it's William's crew or William's gang or something in that, or William's army, I think, or something like that is what they call it. But it's just like might have the weakest world building in anything. They have their own flag. Yeah, they do actually. It's like, yeah, that's about it.
[00:19:52] And it's like, yeah, out of all of this stuff, the world building, we talk about it a lot. It's most of these movies try this doesn't even attempt it. And again, it goes back to the lame names. Like it's clearly just not even a part of the conversation, but this whole thing is under attack and we see Carradine. He's on foot. And there's a woman in town who is Val played by Julian McRider McWhorter. I didn't even look her up. What did she do? She's in the dentist too.
[00:20:22] Um, not a handful of things. Yeah. The only thing I know her from is the dentist too. Yeah. She was in last. Well, I actually had to look up, thought she was in last man standing, but no, she was in a different last man standing. Um, yeah, but she's, she's been a handful of things, but not anything anybody's really heard of. So she runs out of the town or sneaks out of the town at night because it's been under
[00:20:45] attack and she's looking for help essentially, but she arrives to a larger town or goes to a bigger city. And I guess, yeah. Yeah. She just shows up and there's people are on motorcycles and they're jousting on dirt bikes. It's all in straight out of what Knight Riders. Right. So yeah, right. Exactly. Yeah. And, uh, George Ramirez. And so what's weird about the tone of all this is the city doesn't seem dangerous.
[00:21:13] And the guys who are jousting are like really good friends with each other and they're patting each other on the back. Like there for this being this apocalypse movie, there's no hatred to anybody. Everybody's just happy. And like, you know, there's such a different dynamic again when you compare to wall gone wild when they're trying to turn in their tickets to get their cup of water and all the, the guards are angry. It's just a strange thing. I didn't really understand it. It's just, well, because, because again, there's, they don't bother with any world building in this movie. Like you said, it's just, it's just not there.
[00:21:42] Um, so this is just a place for them to recruit some warriors. Yeah. And, and then the scenes just don't flow either. It's just like, you know, Carradine picks her up like on the road. She escapes some guys or something. Well, no. Cause some midgets attacker, which is funny. That's right. Yeah. Midges dress like Jawas. Come running after her. Yeah. This is what's so funny is the head midget is the midget from wheels of fire. It's the same guy, but what's even funnier about this shot.
[00:22:11] And like, they look like Jawas again. And I was like, what does everybody think about Jawas? Right. And so when you see the, they don't cover their heads, at least they're just, they're just wearing cloaks with hoods that they're not putting over their heads. But when you see the wide shot, the first four or five in the front row are real midgets. And then everybody behind them are just kids. They're the same light. Yeah. I didn't look at it that closely. Cause you can see the way they run, like the midgets run like midgets. And then the kids run like kids and you're like, what? Super strange.
[00:22:39] But they do attack and Carradine fights them off and saves her. He doesn't even shoot. He doesn't even fight them off. He shoes them off. He's like, get out of here. Yeah. And then they run away. And then, then he's like, don't you have a weapon? No. Well, it's like, okay. It's just so bizarre. Cause last week land of doom had full on Jawa midgets in it. You know, it's like, and again, we didn't plan this and it's the same looking stuff. So funny. So yeah. But Carradine's like shoes them off.
[00:23:09] She hops in his car and they headed to town. And, but also they're just that Allison is just nighttime and they're watching these biker jumps. And again, Carradine is in his like full on guru cloth. And he's looking like Mr. Peace officer trying to be chill and everything. I think they're meant to play him down. Like the full on like lone gunslinger who doesn't say anything.
[00:23:37] He doesn't have to, and keeps his cool all the time. Right. Again, you can't tell cause he's just phoning it in every which way. But this jousting thing happens and then they go to a tavern. So Carradine and Val are in this tavern and then a fight breaks out. And immediately from between the fight breaking out in this tavern, and this is like what 15 and 17 minutes into the movie. The fight breaking out in the tavern ends and they cut to outside the tavern.
[00:24:06] And everybody's there who's going to be part of this five person group. Like they're all just sitting there. Yes. Right. They haven't found it. So it's the four of them. You're right. And they're like, well, what's in it for us? Sort of thing. And that's the water. Yeah. But that's how it cuts. There's a bar fight and then it cuts to them sitting around a fire. And one of them says, what's in it for us? So and Carradine's playing it cool and just being like, oh, you know, help the girl or whatever. And what's what's in it for him?
[00:24:34] You know, and this is where I started to be like, oh, I hope he I hope he has a real agenda here. And I was like, I hope he's just not Mr. Goody two shoes and walks town to town giving these TED talks or whatever. But they've already alluded because the first time we find Carradine, he asked he asked the guy where William is. So they've alluded that there's something going on with some history with William. It's never explained. Never. We don't know. Do we? Did I miss it?
[00:25:03] The tiniest thing where near the end when Carradine's waiting for the fight to start and Val tells the story or John or Dorian tells the story to Val about, oh, William killed his family and he's out for one. It's like totally missed that. Yeah. But it's it's one line. It's nothing. Right. Again. And it's like it might as well not be there because you don't feel for him. You don't know anything. No, it's. Yeah. And then even at the end, we'll get to it.
[00:25:33] But it's like it's it's I mean, it's a good thing that they didn't allude to the long history between those two, because this would have been such an unsatisfying ending anyway.
[00:26:10] Yeah, exactly. And then you're like, I'm just wasting these guys with a shotgun. It's so weird. Yeah. I got to say, I was impressed by her abilities with this sawed off shotgun later in the show. Yeah. Or later. How, how the kind of distance she gets off of that is impressive. It's like, it's like she's shooting a rifle. It's impressive. There's some good range on that. I was like, huh? It was. So essentially what happens is now, now they have to go.
[00:26:36] They got Miranda on board and she's this shotgun toting chick. And they, they wind back up at the, at the town, the good guy's town where the water is. And everybody is immediately worried about William and his guys attacking because Val knows William's coming. And because Carradine has said, Hey, he'll be here in like a week. So I think we're trying to meant to believe that Carradine is like tracking William and he knows where he is.
[00:27:05] And now Carradine's maybe thinking, Hey, like I can help these guys help me kill William. I think is the idea, but they waste no time and jump immediately into this, like we're training session at the camp where the guys are like, okay, well, we'll help you fight. We're not sure, you know? And they're like, we can't find world gone wild. Exactly. And they're like, we don't, you know, we don't know how to, to fight or do all this sort of stuff.
[00:27:32] And then we see the guys standing out there with some rakes and some shovels. And one of the good guys, it's either John or Dorian is standing there showing them how to swing a shovel, you know, like as a defense thing. It's like, what? It's like, okay, sure. I mean, the, the awesome version of this is in army of darkness. Yes. It's awesome. It's a buildup. There's music. They've got a big line of them and they're doing all their moves.
[00:28:01] And then when the attack finally comes in, they all do their move that Ash shot them on the first round. And they take out this whole wave of skeletons and it feels awesome. Like you're like, they learned something. He taught him something. This is great. There's, there's none of that in this movie. Well, that's the difference between army of darkness with Sam Raimi and this. That's right. And what happens is we get the cutaway to the two chicks that are an hour in the grotto, Val
[00:28:28] and, um, they're, uh, Miranda. Val and Miranda are having a bath. And they both, they're, they're washing each other's backs and they're talking about how they lost their loved ones and why they fight. And then there's a little bit of conversation back and forth about Carradine, like what it is, what does he want? They don't really know, but that's all the setup is there. And then the scene is nothing more than an excuse for the show. And exactly.
[00:28:56] And Carradine is still walking around in his guru kind of gear. Look at cool, calm, collected, like slow breathing. And you, I was just thinking, man, this is going to be the best buildup for this movie for me. I'm thinking there's going to be a moment where he's going to snap and he's just going to turn into like a unisol and just rage. I was so excited. I love that you still had optimism. Yeah. I have to. This is why. Because I was just, I was so bored by this point going, Oh God, how much time is left? Oh my God.
[00:29:26] Yeah. Not even half an hour. And the way that it keeps, it tries to move on. There's one of the villagers isn't happy about Carradine being there and setting all this sort of stuff. So we get a defector essentially. And I think he had some romantic interest in Val as well. Yeah. Well, he was, he's Val's like fiance. They're supposed to get married. And the problem is, is Val and John have some obvious kind of chemistry going on.
[00:29:55] And he doesn't like it. So he doesn't like it. And, but he's also the chief's son. So he's got a little bit of entitlement going on. Yeah. It's kind of like an arranged marriage sort of thing. I think. Exactly. Well, yeah, she makes some comment to John cause he's like, what are you doing with a guy like that? And she's like, this will put peace between our families or something like that. It's basically an arranged marriage, but she's agreed to do it. And she's happy with him, even though this guy's kind of a loser. Um, they peg him as that right from the start. Yeah.
[00:30:23] But, um, yeah, so he doesn't, he doesn't like what's what he's seeing with, with Val and John. And then he's kind of like, you know, maybe we just gotta let William in. Yeah. Cause that, I think that's what it is. He wants control of the town and he thinks, well, if I'll go with William, we can get the town back. Cause Carradine's going to mess, mess up my plans. Carradine's going to get them all killed. That's what it says. Yeah.
[00:30:47] So the pacing, the movie is really weird, but they talk about how they, they have one encounter. It's a small battle and everybody in the town fights them off cause they know how to use their shovels and rakes and everybody leaves and they're like, oh, success. And then I'm, I'm just not really sure how this works, but it's like 45 minutes into the movie. And this is where Dorian says you they're looking up at Carradine on the cliff and Dorian's like, you know, the Raiders killed his family.
[00:31:17] They refer to him as the professor, by the way, which is kind of interesting. He's like, yeah, you know, the professor, it's the only time he's ever written. He's not even credited as the professor on IMDBA. It was a weird line, but we say, you know, the professor and the Raiders killed his family and he's been off for them ever since. And that's, that's the only thing. But now they're prepping the village again for another attack. And you're like, okay, this is going to be the big attack. And now they're like doing all the usual stuff, but I'm like, this is 45 minutes in.
[00:31:46] And so I'm trying to get a tracking of the movie. Like the first act we assemble the team, but now we're prepping the town for the final fight. And I was like, well, maybe the first 45 is one act and we just lost the third, the second act and we're straight onto the third. It's, it's a really weird pacing. Yeah. I think you're giving the script too much credit to have the activisions like that. Probably. And I said act divisions. Yes. Not activision. We should start about activision. It's great games.
[00:32:16] Pitfall one of their anyway. Um, yeah, I loved a battle tank. Oh yeah. There you go. Activision's still around for the most part. So, but yeah, so there. Yeah. I mean, this is, this is not the big final battle because it can't be because you know, there's some, there's still half the movie left because I didn't know that I thought something. Yeah. I thought it was so broken that maybe this is going to be the battle. Like yeah. Yeah.
[00:32:44] Val Gary plays the second or the sub boss or the second, he's second in command under William. And you would not know Val Gary from anything because the star meter is 1.9 million and going down. However, he has 18 credits and he was in the TV movie. Columbo. Columbo goes to college. Nice. Do you love me some Columbo? I love Columbo. We should just talk about Peter Falk.
[00:33:14] You know, if you like Columbo so much and I don't know how you like the crap on, um, Russian doll so much, but you'd probably quite like poker face. Poker face is modern Columbo. Yeah. Is it? Yeah, it is. Like, like to the point of where the fonts are the same. Really? It's a love letter to. Yeah. No, I say this having not watched the second season yet. I've only watched the first, but love that first season, even though it's got what's
[00:33:43] your Natasha Lyonne, who you probably would hate. So you cut all that out if you want, but I just wanted to mention that, that you should probably give it a shot. Yeah. So, oh, he was also in Joe versus the volcano. Nice. I'm just looking myself up on IMDb pro to see if this guy's star meter is better than mine. Oh, I'm, I'm up. I'm up to 600 K again. There you go. Oh, good for you. Uh, six, 680. Cause I was, I was like a million something a while ago. Yeah. I mean, it was, it was only a few months ago where I went up over two and a half million or
[00:34:13] something like that as well. Like it just, I haven't looked at myself in a while. It's amazing how much we, we shoot up and down ebbs and flows when you're working or when you're not working or when people are looking at you for a job. Yeah. Well, hopefully that means I've got some more stuff coming my way because this is a traditionally slow time of year for me. This is where we're at the, for me, we're at the tail end of the busy. And then the summer is where it just becomes the wasteland. Yeah. And that's, it's the exact opposite for me. That's why you're able to take summers off. Like you're planning on.
[00:34:43] Yeah. Um, and why I never get to go away in the summer. Most parts. Um, you know, there was a long while where I was just doing nothing but making Christmas movies all summer. Right. There is the subplot again about this guy, Luis deflecting and going because he wants to keep his girl. I don't even want to talk about it. Cause it's as thin as everything else in the movie. Yeah. And it's just one of the less interesting pieces of the movie, but so they have this other
[00:35:10] attack on the, on the city. And again, it's just, it's no city, my friend. Yes. The cardboard town goes under attack and the, there is action on screen. There's a lot of explosions. There's a lot of people getting shot, falling over, stumbling over barrels, but it's not entertaining cause it's just not coherent. And you just don't care about anyone or anything. No.
[00:35:38] When the villagers get killed or the bad guys get killed. It's just shots of things happening. Yeah. I, um, my facial expressions of when a good guy gets killed versus when a bad guy gets killed in this is probably exactly the same as when I heard they were remaking Robocall. It's just, it doesn't, there's, it's just no. And I mean, you know, and the thing is, is that this is where I was like, I'm certain
[00:36:04] this is the quarry from, uh, from wheels of fire that you can really see it. There's some shots. So I was like, okay. Yep. So they win again because the good guys have showed them how to use their rakes and their, and their, uh, their shovels and everything on how to fight. And they capture Jason and they say like, Hey, we've captured Jason. This means William is going to come. Like he's going to be here. Yeah. And Carradine's excited. Cause now they've got bait to bring William because Carradine wants to kill William. And it's that simple.
[00:36:35] Mm-hmm . So Carradine reminds the villagers, Hey, like today was a cakewalk compared to when William shows up and this is set up to have the final, final battle. So also Carradine's drinking like a mate as well out of like a little cup. Like they're really trying to make him, you know, who would have been better at this role is Steven Seagal. Cause all of the bullshit he comes up with of all of his like fake, you know, his fake,
[00:37:02] uh, um, fake cultures that he's entrenched in are all here in Carradine. And this would have been a better thing for Seagal. Cause also he doesn't. Well, we should clarify not Seagal in 91, but Seagal now. Oh yeah. Yeah. I'm talking 90, 97 fire down below when Steven Seagal decided his legs would no longer move and everything was shot in the store. So I'm still on my Seagal kick right now.
[00:37:32] Cause I was on when we did that roast last night too. So. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was fun. I've been, uh, I would not have been a good participant on that one last night. They are trying to double down about Carradine being this peaceful guy. And again, I'm like, he's going to snap. And when he snaps, it's going to be awesome. It's going to be this like great outrage. Again, I love your optimism every time, Sam, and you've, you've proven wrong over and over again as you will be in this. And yet, yet it's just, it's still there. You still believe in Christmas. I love it.
[00:38:02] Everybody at work says that as well. Like I've had all this terrible stuff we work on. They're like, no matter what it is, we still think it's infectious of how excited you are for dumb stuff. And I'm like, oh, it's like, it's simple. Right? You gotta make, you gotta have fun. Otherwise how else do you get through it? Right? But the thing is, is that we're an hour into this movie and we get another final gear up and prep for the city. And I'm digging traps and all this crap again. And I'm like, how many times are they going to do this?
[00:38:31] Oh, they're going to do it again, Sam. Yeah. Surprise to me. God, I know. And then the attack happens and there's just nothing going on. It's just Carradine on a flamethrower turret that looks like it's made out of plywood hanging off the thing. And then they all turn around and leaves and they're all cheering. And he's like, well, that wasn't William. He's going to be here in a day. I'm like, oh God. And then they prep again, which, and it's all these training on.
[00:39:00] So this is 30 minutes to go now, which shouldn't be, there shouldn't be this much of the movie left, but somehow there is. So, well, there is because they have to lose the town. Yes. Oh God. Yeah. I mean, this is, this is just like a mortar wall when they lose the atoll to the smokers really. And then they all go out and band together. But we get another Ted talk from Carradine and the attack finally begins more flimsy wall.
[00:39:26] These guys jump over the wall and it flexes and flim, like it looks like it's going to break under there. Yeah. Lots of locked off. It's, it's made of what? I don't know. It's not, it's not even, what is it? Like balsa wood or something like that. They're not even two by four. They're like one by threes. They're nothing. It's just the worst. Yeah. It really isn't great set construction at all. And we get all these locked off camera shots of explosions, lots of NPCs getting shot and dying. I don't care about anybody.
[00:39:55] The split between the bad guys and the good guys is really hard to discern. You just have to imagine that every now and then one of them has a ski mask. So it's like, okay, that's a bad guy. Why would you wear a ski mask at 120 degree heat when you're not trying to knock over a 7-Eleven or something? Like, it's like, there's no need to, I, I don't get it. But, um, Carradine's running around with this big pack that he's got. Like he's still in his guru outfit and it's got a big red stripe on it.
[00:40:22] And you kind of get a hint that, oh, that's his pantless wardrobe he was wearing from the beginning. So you get this inkling, like maybe it's going to happen. Maybe something big is going to happen. And you presume his sword is wrapped in there. So the bad guys win, they take the town and William finally enters with a samurai sword and like everybody retreats. And he is the most non-threatening bad guy as well, by the way.
[00:40:48] And he's got like one of those goofy caps with the flap on the back that like protects you from sunburn. Like, I was like, what does he just come off? Like the OSHA site where they're like, need to protect your neck in the sun. Like, it's just such a weird thing for choice for things to wear. I mean, it makes sense, but it just doesn't, it, it seemed weird for him to be this badass. So they're all hanging out by this fire in this little pit way outside the town. Cause William owns the town and there's like a dozen of them or something like that. Not many.
[00:41:18] Mm-hmm. Also, I should mention that Jason, he looks like Bon Scott to me. A little bit, I guess. Yeah. He just kind of had that look to him. I was like, yeah, I was like, huh. He's got a guy beside him. And I thought for a second, is that Jesse Ventura? And then he opened his mouth and he's got the wildest teeth. That guy. I thought, you know, the way his hat was on and stuff like that. I just thought for a split second, but it's like, he looked way more ragged than he should
[00:41:45] have for this being around the time of, of just after a Braxis. Right. So. Right. Oh God. Thank you for saying a Braxis, by the way, we should be watching a Braxis. I love a Braxis. No, I do not love a Braxis. So I went to a live recording of how did this get made? And it was a Braxis. So I watched it in advance for the first time. Yeah. Oh man. I would like to, I should check that out. As somebody who owns more than one physical media copy of a Braxis, I probably should check that out. Are you the coal mater?
[00:42:14] Um, but yes. Anyway. And then Jim Belushi pops up for, or weird reasons. Uh, anyway. Better than this movie. Yeah. Well, yeah. Okay. Braxis was shot here at least. Yeah. So Schwarzenegger was supposed to be in a Braxis originally too. Right. That was the original calling car for it. Yeah. Yeah. And I think the more the budget got cut, the, they, the more they went down the list of predator actors to find who they could get. Yeah.
[00:42:41] That's where the movie kind of got cool for a second because they're like, how are we going to defeat everybody? You know, we're, we're just a bunch of people standing around a fire pit. We have nothing. We have no weapons. We've been driven out of our town. Mm-hmm . Mm-hmm . And then Dorian or John and one of them is like, come this way. And there's a cave and they walk down inside the cave and they hold up a torch and the whole cave is just full of guns and bullets. And I was like, okay, this is awesome.
[00:43:11] Like, this is a cool reveal. You're like, okay, they've been hiding this stuff here forever or something. Mm-hmm . And I'm like, okay, this might turn into something really cool. So as quick as they show that we also see, um, there's a, there's a wooden crate and one of them pries the wooden crate open. And I was like, please just be some Spetsnaz trenching tools in here. Like this would be the ultimate throwback.
[00:43:39] Cause it looks like the wooden crate and I was cracking up. Unfortunately it's hand grenades, but I would have been, I would have been like, Oh man, Robert Siddhar. And that doesn't happen. But then there's this two, two second long. This is my biggest problem with the whole movie. Like I said, there's these super short training sessions. And then immediately after the training session, the villagers are able to beat the incoming war party every time. And so they see all the guns and ammo in this cave and they bring it out to the fire.
[00:44:07] And there's this wide shot and it's so funny. It's so short. It's like a two second shot. And it's, uh, and it's Dorian standing there with all the last villagers. And he's holding a rifle and he cracks open the bolt and he's like showing them and they're nodding cause you can't hear what they're saying. It's super wide. Right. And it's like, I was like, Oh no, he didn't just train everybody how to use this. Like, like so quickly. It's so quick.
[00:44:36] And I was like, I think that's what it is. And then also we get a one shot, a Carradine unwrapping his pantsuit, his pantless pantsuit. And then his swords there. And you're like, okay, he's going to happen. And the better version of this moment of this training sequence is in battlefield earth. And when Johnny good boy learns to speak and read psycho, right? Which is the language. He's able to learn the computers and the history and everything.
[00:45:04] And he learns how to fly the Harrier jet. Right. And then he trains all the other animals, how to fly in the jet or rap brains. If you read the book, whichever way you want to look at it. But he trains them all how to fly. Wait, wait, you read the book too? I listened to it. And so, oh man, I I've been tempted and I've just never. It's good. I don't, I don't get the hype for there's so much worse stuff out there. Like, oh, I'm sure. Yeah.
[00:45:31] And you know, it's just like also Dianetics, but. But you gotta, you gotta remember in battlefield earth. These are basically bare bone primates that get smarter. The one of them gets smarter. Right. And then he's able to read the psychos language and go through all the stuff and learn. And then of course they find this old Harrier jet simulator and they're strapping them all in and like, you know, showing them how to fly the planes. And then it ends up being like, it's just, they're a thousand years old too, by the way,
[00:46:01] from this. Thousand year old Harrier jet. It's like, and no problem. It's like a 50 year old car. Like the, the gaskets dry rot and the hoses perish and all this sort of stuff. And it's like, everything's running at like six and a half pounds or something like that. Like one of those Harriers just got thousands of pounds of hydraulic pressure in it and everything's fine. Like none of that work. I mean somehow still more believable than this movie and whatever, but still a better version of this.
[00:46:27] Like, Hey, we're this dumb impoverished group. And this is how we're going to take over the guys. This movie does it with a two second shot of Dorian, just holding the bolt open on the rifle pointing it to the farmers and they're all like nodding. And they're like, that's it. And then now they're ready to go. It's just, and that's it. And they attack happens. The villagers show up lots of mortars, lots of rockets get flown, blowing up stuff. Lots of styrofoam brick walls exploding.
[00:46:55] Well, I love how these guys are now attacking their town, right? Yeah, exactly. They're blowing up all of their resources. Exactly. And then finally, enter Carradine. Carradine, hero shot up on top of the cliff. It's backlit. He's standing there in his no pants. It's so funny, dude. It looks so weird. It is wild. It's, um, yeah. Cause it's, it's like, it's almost like something you would see a woman wear like as part of
[00:47:25] like a sexy dress where the long piece comes out, comes down between the legs to show the legs off on each side. And it's like, why do you have pants? Like, why are you not wearing those? Like, it's so weird. It's so strange. And the sword fighting here now that happens between a lot of these guys, cause a lot of people have swords in this movie. It's not just Carradine, but I did like to see that there's a couple of closeup shots when they're hitting the swords back and forth.
[00:47:53] And you can tell these are just single cast aluminum blanks that they've poured because all the edges look up big, soft notches in them where they've been hitting against each other. But I really liked that. One of the guys sword, I would put money on it was cast after Conan the barbarian sword. Cause it has that thicker part at the base before the blade. Like it's a hundred percent the Conan the barbarian sword. I was like, yeah. That's, that's what these were all kind of modeled off. They're all going for that aesthetic. I think.
[00:48:22] Cause you know, Carradine would have been way more badass if you had a Katana. Yeah. And well, cause the main bad guy, William has a Katana, but Carradine doesn't. And which actually would make a cooler movie like to take all of like, take like a swords and sorcery movie with like big creatures, like giant snakes and serpents and stuff like that, but put it in the apocalypse actually could be a really cool mashup.
[00:48:48] Like why does a sword and sorcery movie have to happen way back behind us? Why can't it happen in the future? Have you ever heard the theory about the Flintstones and the Jetson? No, I have not. The Flintstones is a sequel to the Jetson. Oh really? Cause it's like everything's gone and they started again. Exactly. That's funny. That's why they have all this sort of knowledge, right? But everything's sort of stone agent and animal powered because yeah, there was like
[00:49:15] this apocalypse and now you have the Flintstones. That's a pretty good theory. And then we, yeah, we got that the, uh, the attacks already happening, right? We got that far. Yeah. So now the action is, is happening and. Is it though? Yeah. Is it though? Because it's not because the sword fights they're hitting. What's really weird is Carradine starts having a sword fight and there's no choreography here. There's no action. They swing a sword between Carradine and William.
[00:49:45] They swing like once. And then we cut away to some guys being shot. And then we cut back there. There's not a single fight scene quote unquote in this movie. Everything's a single shot cut away to something else. There's not more than maybe one return hit or blow to blow. And then it's off. There's not an actual fight in this movie. It's really weird. And then, then suddenly like Carradine just slices Williams hand off. Yeah. And the fight's over. Then it's like, dude, you have another hand and another arm.
[00:50:13] Like, have you not seen the black knight from Monty Python and the Holy Grail? Like put the sword in your teeth. Keep going. But he just sort of backs up. And it's just like. Yeah. One, he's one hand gets cut off. And then Carradine turns around and he looks at all the farmers and he's like, he's all yours. And then they charge him. Cause they're all coming out of the woodwork ready, ready to go after him. And it's just. Yeah. We don't even see that. We just see them all.
[00:50:38] Also this whole collection of shots, you can tell they were stressed on this day because the shadows start getting really long and you know that this was a one day shoot and they were behind because the last four or five shots it's incrementally more and more in shadow and it looks horrible. And you just, I'm, I just remember seeing that and feeling bad for everybody there knowing like this is a long day for everyone. Yeah. For what? You know, that's the worst part. Like really.
[00:51:08] I remember I worked on this movie once. I remember what was called. I think it was behemoth or something. I'm walking to the assistant narrator's room on day one of dailies. And she's just kind of looking at him just, just so I could see him. Cause this is, this is like 15 plus years ago. So it wasn't like, pray my own didn't exist yet and stuff. So, um, I think we're still doing VHS tapes and stuff. So it was just like, well, actually we wouldn't like, you know, I'm You'd lay daily, you'd lay daily, sit up and stuff. Yeah. Sure.
[00:51:36] I always started printing DVDs at a certain point, but yeah. So I, I'd gone into the assistant narrator's room just to take a look at it. And it was like, it's October in Vancouver and they're shooting near Squamish. They're up on the Squamish chief. That sort of mountain, that piece of, giant piece of granite hovers over Squamish. And the rain is just like coming down and you can see it so clearly. And they were shooting on film and you could see it so clearly on the film. And for those of you who don't know, it's really hard to see rain on film.
[00:52:06] Oh yeah. Like it just doesn't show up. And, and to know that we're not using like rain machines or anything else. And I'm just like every, you could see the crew after they cut take and the camera would move a bit and it just looked miserable. Oh God. And they're all in their rain gear. And I just looked at the assistant editor and said, well, it may be a dark windowless room, but we're warm and dry. Like. That is it. Yeah. There are. Oh man. This was like the end of October, early November. And it was just. Oh yeah. Horrendous.
[00:52:36] I just felt so bad for that crew. Yeah. For as many crazy hours we do and like 60 hour long shifts trying to get stuff in done or whatever. The guys on set have it just as worth cause you just, the guys on set have it worse cause it's day in day out for them that things go long and go. Yeah. Well their, their days are always 12 hours minimum.
[00:53:01] And, uh, yeah, I just, I feel for those crews sometimes and you know, it's not too bad. I would get a little annoyed with them sometimes cause they'd, they'd hassle me to do stuff. It's like, well, you get your paid on a 12 hour work week or a 60 hour work week, 12 hour days. And I'm like, dude, I'm on this movie for the next year. You think I can do that 60 hours a week on this movie for a year straight? You're insane. So you can do it cause you're only doing it for 13 or 15 days. Exactly. Well, I like, I always look at it too.
[00:53:30] It's like, especially now everything's on stage and everything, which is always helpful cause you've got like, you know, there's craft services is there, your climate control, you got bathrooms or everything. But I look back at something like flight of the Phoenix or something like that is laborious. Like being just out there day in day out. And, but the movies look good. You know, it, it's like, Oh, well you contributed to something that's incredible. So. Well, you look at like Lawrence of Arabia or something. Yeah. And I, I always fault that movie for its day for night stuff.
[00:53:59] But I mean, the cinematography is amazing. It's okay. I think I came up with a movie that I thought looked better that we recently watched, but Okay. Predator. No, I think we're talking about day for night stuff and I was like, Oh yeah. Probably better than Lawrence of Arabia. Cause it's not day for night. Yeah. Yeah. No, I sort of vaguely remember that now. Yeah. But that's what I mean. But day for night as much as it pisses me off. So it pissed me off when I saw that in Lawrence of Arabia, but I kind of forgave it because
[00:54:26] it's, it's Lawrence of Arabia and it was the late fifties, early sixties, whenever that came out. There's a certain type of day for night that I see and I feel comforted and it's always in old Westerns. So, and when I see it, I'm like, Oh, I'm watching an old Western and I kind of like it, you know, cause I'm like, Oh, this is cool. Yeah. Like I enjoy it. But then again, you see that they're casting shadows and you're like, Oh, this must've been a long shoot day. You know, that, uh, film stock used to be called tungsten two 40, which was the classic use for that.
[00:54:54] It was really, really blue, but it worked great. Anyway, we're trying not to talk about this movie because it's really not great, but we're almost at the end. I promise. We're almost done. Yeah. So basically after all this stupid stuff happens, the wrap up is that Erdine is, is the guy's dead. His arms cut off. The villagers get to him. Karateen immediately just turns around, shows up back in his guru outfit and he's looking cool, calm and collected. He's packed up. He's got his pantless suit and his sword over his shoulder.
[00:55:24] And they're all wanting to say, they were like, Hey, why don't you stay? There's water. We all love you. We're all so grateful. That's Merck's. And he's like, Nope. And he says, my work is done here. Wow. Creative time for me to move on. And then he rolls out, but also the two guys, John and John leaves on a motorcycle. Dorian stays with the girl. And then I just don't know the purpose of John's character at this point.
[00:55:51] He just was there to be an extra person to make it look like a bigger crew because he doesn't really go anywhere. You don't know his backstory. You don't know why he rides off into the sunset, whatever. He doesn't go with. We should point out, Miranda gets killed in the fight. Just gets like shot up in the back. Then she turns around and blows those guys away with a shotgun. Yeah. So at least she's able to avenge her own death. But so that's why she's not there at the end. Yeah. Um, but we don't even care. It's like, because she does not invest. The movie doesn't invest in her. So I don't. And well, this is that cause her and John hooked up too, right?
[00:56:21] Early on too, which we, which we didn't touch on John, not heartbroken at all. No, I think he's just to give the movie credit. He's just like, well, everything else has been taken from me. I'm just going to hit the road and continue on. It doesn't really matter. All we get is everybody rolls out. The people who stay, stay the people who leave, leave. And we see a shot of Carradine in his guru outfit up on the top of the quarry with the sunshine on him, big silhouette and guitar track. Credits were all.
[00:56:51] Yeah. Um, I need to say though, like, I think it was during the, during the very ending music. It's a blatant rip off of the end theme of Battlestar Galactica, the original series. Yeah. It's like, it's, I was like, oh man, those notes are the same. And then it would do something slightly different and it would go back to it and then go somewhere different again. I was just like, oh man, this is so skirt in the edge. And then, yeah, then we get like a rock music. Yeah. With lyrics.
[00:57:21] With which, which is like almost echoey too. It sounded really kind of funny. It's a weird mix. Yeah. Yeah. It was a strange, strange sound to it, but okay. But speaking of the music, usually all of these, like, I love the music and this is just unremarkable. There is nothing. There's no theme. There's no constant. It, I couldn't tell you a single thing. I haven't just watched it. Like the music is completely forgettable.
[00:57:46] The best part of this movie is the opening sequence of Carradine in his pantless cloak with the sword. It's like cooler than everything else. And you're led to believe that it's going to go somewhere and get better. And it really doesn't. Nope. This again, just feels more forced trying to look like this than the earlier stuff again, in this way late in the game for these Mad Max rip offs. Mm-hmm .
[00:58:11] And again, Sierra Santiago, and you compare it to Wheel of Fire, even Eliminator 2000, like, they just looked better. Well. And they probably didn't have the budget. 10 years later, they probably had less money than this movie. And somehow they still- Maybe, or maybe it was starting to dwindle at this point. Yeah. This, um, I want to say this is getting late in his career, but it's not. No, this is like in the middle. Yeah. So maybe, my guess is maybe the money was running out for this sort of stuff. Yeah.
[00:58:41] But, uh, but I could be wrong on that. But I mean, what do you do with this? Did you do a modern remake? No. Like there's nothing here to- This has been done so, this has been done so many times. Yeah. And again, if you've done better, dare I say it, in World Gone Wild. I don't think you could fix it with recutting it or reshoots or anything really. No. Like there's, you could, if you really tried to have all a bunch of backstory for Carradine's
[00:59:06] character, but even if you did entrench the viewers in all this cool backstory about him, he does nothing either side of that on screen. So there's no payoff. I'm sure Carradine's name is the only thing that got him the financing to make this thing in the first place. Probably. For whatever international market they were trying to sell it to. But still, it's just, it's not there. IMDB lists this movie with a TRT of 78 minutes, but we watched this on Tubi and it was all 93 minutes. Yeah.
[00:59:34] So I would have been so happy to lose that 15. It would have been the same. I would not have gained anything or let's just say we wouldn't have lost anything at that point. There's just nothing in this. I wouldn't have. It's from what little research I've did that this is apparently a director's cut, which has like an extra 15 minutes. Yes. This is the unrated official full director's release cut. So you can't actually get it. Yeah.
[01:00:03] There's nothing in this. Well, there's a bit of gore in this. You see some boobs. Like when people get, when people get shot, there's blood, which they were keeping down. So I imagine, and there's a fair bit of that. So you can get the Blu-ray of this, which is part of the Roger Corman post nuke collection from Code Red, which of course includes wheels of fire and equalizer 2000. These are both just so funny.
[01:00:30] And I actually kind of want to get those just for the sake of right now. Yeah. Then, um, but yeah, the uncut director's cut, which is what we saw on 2V because I imagine this was a 2015 restoration, an HD rescan, and that's going to be what they're licensing out to the streaming services right now. Yeah. That's why it's widescreen everything. It looked fine. Looked good. You can also get this Blu-ray for anywhere in the $20 range on eBay.
[01:00:58] It's long out of print, but there's enough of them floating around and kicking around. If you really want to get in this movie, you can get the VHS copy for the low, low price of $4.50 right now in abundance on eBay. So that'll be the 78 minute version too. Yeah, I know. I was like, man, that actually is more appealing to get just because it's shorter. Um, film, this movie was shot in two locations exclusively, of course, LA and Metro Manila in the Philippines.
[01:01:27] Once again, we return every shot in LA, probably some stage. So maybe something to Carradine's who knows? Like, yeah. Hmm. I mean, to your point, most of it's outdoors and feels like it's out side, but I don't know. Maybe some pickups, who knows? Maybe. Yeah. I can't see it. Cause the only real indoor thing is, is the cave that scene, but I can't see them doing that. Honestly. Yeah, exactly. Maybe they just lied about it so they could get a credit or a tax credit or something. Who knows?
[01:01:55] Maybe they did a single pickup or something. Or they did post in LA and they just, they just bunched it in. Who knows? Uh, Ruby Cabarelles, the sound effects editor. He was also credited as a sound effects editor on Equalizer 2000. No surprises there. Mm-hmm. Assistant editor, Joe Santos, who was also the assistant editor on Wheels of Fire. Again, it's, it's all the same circle. Mm-hmm . Kevin Reedy was the producer on this movie who grew up to do things like Mortal Kombat and Shanghai Noon.
[01:02:25] So he, he went somewhere. Yeah. Good for him. Yeah. It's just kind of a maintenance film of wasteland movies. It's like, keep the genre going, keep everything happening. There'll be another one coming in a few years. Just it's, it's not inspiring. It's not visionary. There's nothing new here. We don't capitalize on Carradine. It's just, yeah, it's, uh, I, we've certainly watched worse, but I just feel a little deflated from this one.
[01:02:54] And I, uh, I wish I had something more redeeming or more interesting or exciting to say, but. Well, I mean, I, I regret picking it cause it's, again, this is World Gone Wild Redux. Yeah. And like, that was, that was my last pick. So I'm just like, oh, I just did the same thing again. And completely unknowingly, I gotta say, I like, if I had known there's no way in hell I would have left this for like one of our, like November episodes or something since we'll be doing this all year. We will be. Yeah. Yeah.
[01:03:22] And I, I just apologize to you guys for listening because we're on this rut right now of all these bad mood, like nothing's getting me exciting. Nothing's getting me pumped. Like we, it's what I appreciate you guys coming along for the ride, but I, uh, I do understand that, that these are all kind of downer movies and we're not, we're not while we're watching them. So you guys don't have to, we're not discovering any gems right now. And, uh, we'll, we'll continue to do this and hopefully we'll, we'll come across a couple gems here and there, but find something. Yeah.
[01:03:52] Yeah. IMDB score. Yes. IMDB score 4.1. That's high. That's out of 10. Yeah. For 636 reviews though. I like the low reviews. So I'll give you that every time. And then, uh, Dune Warrior it's, it's 2.9 out of five, which is crazy. Sorry. Unletterboxed. I mean, um, yeah, that, that's crazy. This is going to be carotting the invoice going back or 645 reviews.
[01:04:21] So this is, this is up there with our lowest, uh, one of our lowest. So how many, I mean, how many people are reviewing this just because of carotting, not wearing pants? Like this is the only thing. I don't know. Big redeeming quality. Something. Yeah. Carrotting thigh. I just, this should be a bit more of a, uh, uh, a, a filtering process or a vetting process for somebody to write. Cause there's probably somebody who rated it 10 or five. Right. Like is always the case.
[01:04:50] Yeah. I'm just, I'm, I'm scrolling through on letterboxes, some three and a half. Is there as high as I get? What about IMDB? Somebody must've rated it 10. Well, oh, probably, but I don't know if we'll get that. User reviews. There's 10 of them. There you go. There's an eight. Yeah. They, that's the problem to me because you'll probably look up predator or something and it's not even a, like this is. Yeah. This is like more post-apocalyptic sci-fi action fun from zero H Santiago.
[01:05:20] So this is like, this is a fan boy. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, I don't know. I just, yeah. Everything's overinflated and all these reviews, but as always, look, I appreciate you guys listening. We're very thankful for it. We do apologize. We're in this just perpetual rut of these horrible movies, but that's our job. We're here to do these, watch these. So you don't have to, and it filter out many of the lesser enjoyable films and find a nugget
[01:05:50] or two here and there and pass them on to you. So we're happy to be here. We're happy to do this. It's always fun. Of course, anything, but, but casino casino, and we appreciate you guys for everything. And we will see you next week at the movies. Bye. atlpical, why have you meltedouver maharlle? I get those mountains.
[01:06:20] You, right. No. Theo, nothing. Who is to stagnate! Episode 13 x battles, Reserted master's enemy. lived from 2010 and to 2018. 모 Alphazza Match.